Sunday, July 29, 2012

Signing Off (of CaringBridge)

It has been a week of remembrance.  By this day one year ago I was on my third appointment at the breast center in a week, that is about as many times as I had been to a doctor in the year before.  The dark clouds had moved in on Tuesday morning when I went for my mammogram/sonogram and was told that I had two tumors in my right breast that were most likely cancerous.  By Thursday, I was back for a needle biopsy of those tumors, and on Friday, my fears were confirmed by pathology report that I did in fact have Invasive Ductal Carcinoma.  So here I sit a year later wondering how to adequately memorialize this incredibly difficult yet life-changing week of my life.  Do I throw a party?  Do I take a trip?  Do I go to a spa? Hmm, these all sound nice. But something in me feels the need to sit and write.

When I first signed on to use the CaringBridge website last August, little did I know that it would become a spiritual inventory that I will cherish for the rest of my days.  The initial intention of it was to have a place to where family and friends could go to be updated on test results and surgery dates.  But as I began to write, an emotional release happened and a record of God’s goodness started to form.  I am so grateful for those that have followed my CaringBridge over the last year. But even if there had been no one to read it, I would have continued writing.  My soul seems to agree with all that I have read about the advantages of journaling. 

I realize that all that is needed to journal is a pen and paper, and journals are often kept private.  I also realize that people have finite amounts of time, which they might not want to devote to reading my random thoughts especially when they aren’t focused on cancer.  However, there just might be some part of my story that resonates and encourages someone else.  Or perhaps some detail of my journey that I have written about will answer a question for another woman who has recently been diagnosed with breast cancer.  Maybe my recording of God’s goodness will be my own spiritual fuel for times when I need it in the future.  Writing could potentially boost my immune system and act as an additional cancer-fighter or so I have heard.  These are the thoughts that have led to my decision to create Pinked Perspective ( and wrap up my CaringBridge page.  Since I am a bit compulsive about celebrating dates as well as carrying a task to completion, I find it appropriate to close up my page with this final journal entry on this, the one-year anniversary of my diagnosis. 

For those that followed our journey through the CaringBridge this year, we want to say “thank you”. Your thoughts, your prayers, your words and your kind acts inspired us to keep believing that we would be standing on this side remembering God’s goodness a year later.    

Friday, July 27, 2012

A Year Later

"Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you.  Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul."
 Psalm 143:8

"As you look to me, I show you what to do now and next."
 from Jesus Calling by Sarah Young

These are the precious words I read one year ago yesterday after receiving the scariest news of my life.  In a moment of sheer desperation, I did the only thing that made sense...I turned to Jesus.  His message to me was undeniable.  He gave me these words that would make their way onto a very special t-shirt and set the trajectory for the next year of my life. As I reflect on the year, I am awed by His faithfulness that at every step along the way, He did show me the way I was supposed to go, and each new day was evidence of His unfailing love.  

Tuesday, July 10, 2012

A Long-Awaited Vacation

If there were ever a need for a pause button, it was while on our first family vacation since treatment for breast cancer. With the exception of last year's trip, which was cancelled because of my treatment, we have vacationed in Carolina Beach, NC for the last eight summers with my best friend (since we were five) and her family.

The husbands sort through numerous internet listings to find us the perfect beach house.  If you have ever vacationed at the beaches of North Carolina, this is what the homes tend to look like.
They are built so tall in order to capture amazing ocean views that an elevator is often a necessity.

The days are spent swimming in the ocean and digging in the sand while we catch up on the last year of life.  

There is a list of traditions that must be fulfilled including a marathon grocery run for the guys,
Carolina BBQ at Jackson's, Squigley's ice cream, breakfast at the famous Britt's Donuts, golf for the guys, dinner out for the girls, and a walk through downtown Wilmington.  

We have made an extra effort to get away for weekend trips but the truth is we were starving for a vacation.  And although it feels like the week went by in a blink, we are so grateful for the memories that were made, the relationships that were deepened and the refreshment our souls experienced.  

Do you have plans to get away and make memories with your family this year? 

Wednesday, July 4, 2012


Several weeks ago I was invited by two of my sweet friends to go watch the sunrise on the beach.  It wasn’t my first sunrise, but it was the first since walking my journey. No doubt about it, the Lord met me there that morning, and ever since I have been hooked.  Since we are on vacation at the beach this week, it was definitely in my plans to enjoy a few sunrises.  As I was taking in today’s sunrise, I realized a few reasons why I love it so much:

It requires a bit of sacrifice but makes the experience that much greater.

No two sunrises are ever the same and yet the end result is always the same.

 With each blink, the sky changes.

 Even with the clouds, the beauty remains and often makes it even more beautiful.

 The water reflects the glory of the sun.

 If you leave too soon, you may miss the most spectacular view.